Wednesday, July 25, 2007


Sitting here at a library in Gorham, NH I am saddened.

First, I am being charged $$ for this service... at a LIBRARY!!!
Second, this library does not let me get to my family at the Shitizens
Third, no hobowars either.

Life is now over.

Well I've made it over the majority of the white mountains, and I'm relatively still intact. My heal turned out to be just fine... a sprain is all. Its still bugging the crap outta me but I'll live.... maybe.

So the adventure count has begun with:
1 moose shit cocktail (ingredients below)
2 mouse bites
1 sprained ankle
many weak minded and feeble tourists, whom prefer to backpack the right way carrying at least 70 lbs in their packs, and love to share their advice and elite knowledge and wisdom of the back country to all who will hear.
1 belly full of delicious and aged scotch mmm... and free...

Word of advise:
If you're really thirsty and find water runoff as your only source to drink from, be ready to face the reality of where that said water originates.
So early on in the trip (on the north side of Moosilauke coming up Mt. Garfield) I was getting a bit dry, as in I was nearly out of water and I was trying to save the last gulp for when I actually found a source. My head was pounding, my lips were already starting to crack and I was over all in a relatively crummy mood. So I'm going up this ridge and I happen upon this group of day hikers that are just packing up a picnic they had just partaken in. So as I walk by this guy, I'll call him Flap Jack, Flap Jack stands up and shouts to me,"How's it going?!" I reply by saying "eh, alright I guess. I looking forward to getting some water..." Right when I say this Flap Jack looks down and I notice what this guy is glancing at... 2 full gallon jugs of delicious water. Well, after that little glance Flap Jack looks up at me, hesitates, then says to me, "I hear that there's plenty of water on the trail you'll surely find something." As I'm standing there, I can't believe what I'm hearing. Was this fool trying to help? I was speechless to say the least. Well after standing there in shock from hearing that crap spew from this worms mouth I politely nod and say "Gee, thanks..." I then turn and leave.

A bit further down the trail, still waterless, I stumble upon some water runoff on the trail. Its looking pretty nasty and cloudy, but I was just too thirsty. I fill up my 2 bottles and treat the water with twice the amount of instructed chemicals and top it off with some lemonade powder. I let it sit for a half hour as opposed to the normal 15 I usually wait just to make sure any giarrdia cyst is killed, and then I drink. I down an entire quart right there, and oh the sweet relief. Now fully refreshed I stand up and resume walking. Not 20 feet up the trail I find something that changed my life forever. The source of the water.... Lord have mercy on us all! I come to the top of the hill and I see some bog boards going over this puddle (where the water was coming from) and I look down into this puddle, or I should say over this puddle. What is it I see? I see Mounds upon mounds of moose shit. In this puddle and piling up out of the puddle I see more moose shit than actual water. What it looked like was that this was the restroom for the local moose population. I was absolutely filled with glee. For I just had just consumed 1 qt of moose shit tea. mmmmmmm........

so for a refreashing and delicious treat:
1qt of water/moose pellets brewing for oh 1 week.
15 drops of aqua mira
about 3 cups of lemonade mix
and 1 big smile.

Dent Burntrap.

No comments: